Wild
by iamthescotslamb
Summary: Set roughly three years after Brendan's arrest. Dalker & Stendan.
1. Chapter 1

**I haven't written fanfiction in a while, and my last two pieces weren't very good, so please don't expect much. I've put off writing a multi-chapter fic for a while because last tome I tried I abandoned the fic and annoyed people, so I apologise in advance if I do that again. I know this fic is risky, and I know people will comment on how unrealistic it is, but hey, you don't have to read it. This is just a short, introduction-type chapter to get my mind flowing. Reviews are love.**

_**February 2016**_

Doug's life was dull. Sure, he had a few friends, a nice business, he earned a good amount of money. Over the years Ste had managed to gather together his life and they had built back up their friendship, which was good, he supposed.

But something was missing, he couldn't pinpoint exactly what, but he knew there was nothing _motivating_ him, driving him forward. He wanted something more, something exciting. Gone were the days when he'd run drugs and skim past dangerous, rogue looking people. Gone was the adrenaline.

His life was basically a routine. He'd get up, smile at Leanne and Dennis, wondered why he hadn't moved out yet, go to the deli, work until eight, come home and go to bed early. Every day.

Every so often, Ste invited him out. Come to the club, he'd say. Drinks on me, he'd say. Doug would go along every so often, and it would be nice, a laugh. For the most part anyway, until someone would catch Ste's eye, a young teenager, just old enough to be there, or an older man, manly and handsome, and he'd disappear into the office with them; his office. Doug wouldn't get a look in, not sitting next to someone like Ste.

Sometimes, Doug wouldn't leave straight away, he'd wait a while, sipping his drink, thinking that maybe with Ste preoccupied, someone might notice him. No-one ever did, and Doug thought, _why would they?_ Then, Ste would emerge from his office, looking satisfied and smug.

Once, after Ste had been with a particularly sweet-looking guy, Doug had asked, "Are you gonna see him again? He was cute..."

Ste had snorted, "Nah, he'll only get clingy, not ready for that, me."

They never really spoke of why Ste wasn't ready. Nearly three years and he hadn't had a single relationship, not since him. He couldn't imagine seeing anyone more than once.

Doug envied Ste, sometimes. Men always fawned all over him, not that he blamed them, Ste was gorgeous. He hadn't aged since Doug had met him. But in a way, Doug was glad he wasn't Ste. To an outsider, Ste would seem constantly happy, and although he wasn't miserable like he once was, Doug knew he wasn't over that man. He didn't know if he ever would be.

Doug had been on dates, every now and then. Sometimes they'd last a little while, but it never worked. He never felt that fire in the pit of his belly, overwhelming him with desire, and he wasn't sure if he ever had. Other people had, he knew that. Ste had told him about it, once, when he was drunk out of his mind, and emotional, about a year previously.

"It's like... It's like nothing I've ever felt Dougie, y'know?" He'd slurred from his position slumped on the sofa.

Doug was making him coffee in an attempt to sober up. He was thankful that Amy had arrived in the morning to take the kids for the weekend. He didn't know what had triggered Ste's sudden spiral downwards that night, he just knew he'd found him clutching a small whisky glass in his club, sobbing quietly, even as Doug dragged him home.

"What is?" He asked, bringing over his coffee.

"That... That feelin'... When he looked at me, like... Like he wanted to eat me whole..."

Doug didn't have to ask who "he" was, so he simply sat next to him and helped him sip the drink, "Eat you whole, hmm?"

"Yeh! Proper-" He was interrupted by a hiccup, "Proper sexy, like... An' you just, you just... You feel like you wanna lock yourself in a room with him forever... An' lick every inch of skin... An' no-one else can ever make you feel like that... Like your gonna combust from jus'... Jus' one touch... Y'know?"

Doug didn't know. He wanted to know, but he didn't. He'd never felt like that before, not with anyone.

But that was about to change.

XXX

It was cold that day. Doug was wrapped up in his scarf, gloves, the works. Snow covered the village like a white blanket, and it invaded the deli as the wind blew open the door.

Doug sighed and pulled on his coat, grabbing the broom and sweeping out the snow before changing the door sign to "closed", leaving and locking the door behind him. As he did so, he felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand on end, felt that eerie sensation, like he was being watched.

He simply shrugged it off and blamed it on the cold, heading up the stairs to his flat.

"Leanne? Den-" He stopped himself as he spotted the note on the sofa, scrawled in Leanne's handwriting.

_'Went away for the weekend with Dennis, call if you need anything! xx'_

Doug smiled to himself; he did love Leanne. Since Texas' death and Will's eventual arrest, she was the last remainder of his life before, well, everything. The flat was getting too small for the married couple and him, however, and he was considering moving out some time soon.

Doug got all set for another lazy night at home, he pulled off his work clothes and pulled on a dressing gown, he fetched some ice cream and assorted junk food from the kitchen, settled down on the sofa and flicked through the TV channels.

Around 9pm he got a text from Ste, inviting him out to a new club in Chester. Doug politely declined, knowing how the night would end: him pushed to the side, feeling left out as Ste fended off the attention of several admirers.

As he put his phone back down, there was a knock at the door. He frowned, wondering who it could be, after all with Leanne and Dennis gone, there wasn't many people who would want to visit him at this time.

He pulled himself off the sofa and answered, opening the door half way. He squinted in the dark, barely seeing the figure outside.

"Hello?" He called out to them, "Who is it?"

Piercing blue eyes flashed at him in the moonlight as the figure stepped closer.

Doug couldn't believe his eyes.

Simon Walker.


	2. Chapter 2

**I probably should have mentioned this in the first chapter, but this fic is slightly AU. Everything is the same apart from a few details, such as, Walker was freaked out after he slept with Brendan in Hollyoaks Later because of his immense hatred of him, not because he was straight. And his death wasn't so vicious, lets just say there was a chance he could have survived. Also, I apologise for any mistakes I've made regarding the law system, and please ignore the tiny plot holes, I did my best. And I promise I'll make the next chapters longer. Thanks for reading!**

It's safe to say Walker was amused by the look on Doug's face. He went as white as a sheet, eyes bulging. He blinked several times, almost as if making sure his eyes were working properly. He stood in place, seemingly frozen in shock.

"Wh... Wha- You..." He stuttered over his words, staring at the man before him. Surely it wasn't...?

It stopped being amusing to Walker when Doug seemed to snap out of it, and attempted to slam the door shut. He stuck his foot out, preventing the door from closing, and shoved it open.

Doug practically flew back, tripping a little as he stumbled backwards into the flat, "What- You're dead! I..." The back of his legs hit the sofa as Walker walked inside the flat, "Get out!"

Walker calmly closed the door behind him and looked over Doug. He was a quivering mess, and not in a good way.

"It's nice to see you too, Douglas."

It was almost as if the sound of Walker's voice triggered Doug to be hit by the reality of the situation, and his eyes filled with tears. He, bravely, shoved Walker in the chest, "Get _out_!"

Walker was far stronger than Douglas, and barely stepped back, "I'm not here to hurt you," He said cooly, "Calm down."

"Calm down?! You're meant to be dead! You... How?!" Doug shook his head, "No, don't tell me how, just _leave_!"

Walker sighed, "You're being completely irrational."

Doug stared at him, incredulous. Surely this wasn't actually happening?

"Irrational?! A murderer just showed up on my doorstep and forced himself in!" Doug cried.

Walker remained calm, "I am not on the run from the law, I am not here to harm you, will you please hear me out?"

Doug cursed under his breath, making Walker smirk.

"How do I know you're not just gonna... Distract me and then..."

"And then what? Kill you?" Walker rolled his eyes, "I've just got back into the real world, why would I risk being taken out again?"

Doug was curious, he had to admit. He was scared, angry, confused, but curious. He looked around whilst tightening his dressing gown self consciously, trying to figure out a quick getaway if something bad happened. He noticed that Walker was pretty much how he remembered him, hair styled messily, clean shaven. Except there was dark circles under his eyes, and he looked thin.

When Walker got no reply from the younger man, he took that as his cue to speak, "I survived... Obviously," He flashed a smirk, "I believe I was found a day later, I was knocked flying by that lovely train, I was told I landed on the grass by the bridge," The look on Doug's face told Walker that he obviously didn't know all the details of his "death", but he continued anyway, "The whole trial was kept very hush hush, the force didn't exactly favour in the thought of one of their team being accused of attempted murder infront of the public."

Doug interrupted, "You killed Riley! While you were trying to kill Ste, how would you even begin to explain that?!"

Walker paused, watched Doug levely, "You finished?"

Doug scowled, but didn't say anything more.

"Yes, I'll admit, I've done some terrible things, I'm not proud of any of it, but I'm trying to change," He held up his hand when Doug tried to protest, "I am. I pleaded NGRI, which means not guilty by reason of insanity, my plea was accepted; I suppose being a police officer helped with that."

Doug scoffed, "_Ex_ police officer."

Walker chose to ignore his remark, "I was admitted into a mental institution until they deemed I was no longer a danger."

"And that took nearly three years, what a surprise." Doug said sarcastically, folding his arms.

"Actually, just a year and seven months. I voluntarily stayed for the rest." Walker looked away for a second.

Doug didn't have a response to that, he simply said, "Why are you here?"

Walker seemed to consider this for a moment, "I need a place to stay."

Doug laughed in disbelief, "You have got to be kidding!"

"No, I'm not." Walker's eyes seemed to pierce into him, making Doug uneasy.

Doug shook his head, walking into the kitchen, partly to get away from Walker's gaze, "This is madness! You can't just turn up on my doorstep after everything you did and, and-" He gestured with his hands, at a loss for words.

Walker leaned against the wall, watching Doug, humour sparkling in his eyes, "You're sexy when you're angry."

Doug looked like he wanted to throttle him, but chose not to let him rile him up, "You're not staying in my flat. Not after what you did to Riley, to Ste, to Declan-"

Walker interrupted him, expression serious, "I'm offering you my sincerest apologies. Believe me, if I could stay in a hotel or something similar, I would, but I have no money, not so much as a penny."

"Then sleep on the street!"

"That's rather cold, Douglas."

Doug laughed bitterly, "The irony! You of all people saying that!"

Walker pushed himself off the wall and took a few steps towards Doug, who stood his ground. Walker was rather impressed by that.

"Look, I wouldn't be asking if I wasn't desperate."

Doug shook his head once again, "Why me? Out of everyone?"

Walker shrugged, "Well, I have to stay in the Chester area if I want to check in with my psychologist, I could hardly ask a stranger."

"But you must have known I'd say no, after everything?"

"I thought I'd have a better chance with you than the other young man that knows me in this village." Walker replied.

Doug had to give him that. One look at Walker and Ste would probably grab the nearest weapon.

"Well, I'm not letting you stay here, so this whole conversation is pointless." Doug said indignantly.

Walker held up his hands, "Fine, fine. I can take a hint," He walked to the front door, "I'll see you." He added, opening the door.

"No you won't." Doug retorted.

Walker smirked as he left, walking into the cold air of the night.

XXX

Doug awoke early the next morning, still shaken from the events of the night before. He still couldn't wrap his head around it. Simon Walker was not only alive, but walking free. It both scared him and intrigued him.

He had a quick breakfast of toast and orange juice, pulling on his same old work clothes. He thought about Walker's words, how he had apologised and insisted he was trying to change. Was that true, or was it simply another one of his tricks to manipulate people? Either way, Doug didn't trust him.

He left the flat, bundled up in warm clothes as protection from the cold, and made his way to the deli. Business was slower during the winter months, but he still had a fair amount of customers, most seeking warmth and hot chocolate.

He let himself into the deli, pulling off his coat and replacing it with his apron, turning the heating on. The morning passed by uneventfully, a few students coming in on their way to college or university, but no-one special. Around noon, however, a rough looking Ste appeared at the counter as he cleaned the coffee machine.

"Iya," He said meekly, rubbing his forehead.

"Big night I take it?" Doug asked with a smile as he turned the machine back on.

"Drunk way too much, me. Probably cause all me drinks were bought for me," Ste snorted a small laugh, "Can I have a coffee?"

"Sure," Doug set about making one for him, "Pick up anyone?"

Ste flashed him a grin which said it all, making Doug roll his eyes and smile fondly.

He wouldn't lie, he did miss the days when Ste would be working along side him. But ever since Ste had successfully bought the club, it just wasn't how things were meant to be. Ste had been kind to him, though. He had signed over the deli and stopped by before he had to go to the club to teach Doug how to cook properly. Doug was grateful for that, in spite of everything.

Doug finished making the coffee the way he knew Ste liked and handed it to him.

"Ta," Ste smiled at him, "What did you get up to last night then?"

Doug considered his answer for a short moment before replying, "Nothing much, lazy night infront of the telly."

He didn't want to worry Ste, or bring up unwanted memories, not after all the work Ste had made to improve.

"Ooh, exciting." Ste teased, earning himself a playful wack on the arm.

"Don't be mean, I just made you coffee!" Doug said in mock hurt.

Ste laughed, "Seriously though, you need to get out more!" He sat on the sofa, sipping his coffee.

Doug sat next to him, "I'm fine, honestly, I get out enough."

Ste shook his head, "You really don't, I mean... When's the last time you had a shag?"

Doug gasped, shoving him gently, "Ste!"

Ste laughed, "What?! It's a basic human need, you can't live your whole life wanking off!"

A blush crept up Doug's cheeks, "I'm not having this conversation!"

Ste giggled in that dirty way of his, "No, answer the question! When was the last time?"

Doug thought about it and mumbled quietly, "About... Five months."

"Five months?!" Ste yelped.

"Alright, alright, keep your voice down!" Doug hissed, blushing even more, "It's not that bad... I just haven't had much success with dates..."

"You don't need a date! I've told you, come with me and I'll be your wingman, you can have a bit of fun!"

Doug muttered, "Except you'll end up having the fun."

Ste scrunched his face up, "What?"

Doug sighed, "Nothing... Look, the bar scene isn't really... Me, y'know?"

Ste shrugged, "If you change your mind, I'm only a phone call away."

Doug nodded, smiling, "I know, and thanks."

Ste kissed his cheek and got up, "Gotta get back, kids will be back from school soon and the flat's a mess."

Doug nodded, "That's fine, I was gonna change shifts with Jon anyway."

Jon was Doug's co-manager. He'd hired him last summer, when all the paperwork and stock managing got too much for him and Ste suggested getting a little help. Jon was sweet and charming, he had two beautiful kids and a loving wife. He had the domestic life that Doug longed to have one day, although he doubted that particular dream would come true.

XXX

Doug left a little while after Ste, saying his goodbyes to Jon. He wandered across the village, suddenly craving a bear claw from the bakery he liked. The snow was falling gently, the snow flakes catching on his eyelashes as he walked. He'd always liked the sound of the snow crunching beneath his feet, it reminded him of going to the park in the winter with his many siblings as a child in Brooklyn. He missed those days.

He arrived at the bakery and paid for his pastry, walking back out into the cold. As he walked again, he heard coughing coming from an alleyway. He glanced into the alley and frowned. There, sitting on the cold ground, with nothing but a coat wrapped around him and a bag for a pillow, was Simon Walker.

Doug stopped walking and hesitated. He should just keep walking, right? Walker wasn't his friend, he didn't even like him, quite the opposite. So why wasn't he walking away?

He sighed heavily and cleared his throat to make his presence known. Walker glanced up and had the dignity to look mildly embarrassed.

"Doug. Fancy seeing you here." He quipped dryly.

Doug walked over to him, "You weren't lying about having no money then..."

Walker looked up at him steadily, "No."

There was a moments silent before Doug hesitantly sat down next to him, "You slept here?"

Walker nodded, "Yes."

"Must have been cold." Doug commented awkwardly.

"It was."

There was another moments silence before Walker spoke again, "Do you know why I did the things I did?"

"Because you were batshit crazy?" Doug looked at him.

Walker chuckled, "That too. But, at the time, I thought my reasoning was rational."

Doug paused, "Ste said that you blamed your brothers death on Brendan."

Walker nodded, "He sold him the drugs that killed him."

Doug watched him carefully, "He chose to take them though. Brendan didn't force them on him."

Walker's eyes flashed momentarily, spiking fear up Doug's spine. However, Walker closed his eyes and took a deep breath before opening them.

"I know that," He said quietly, "I know."

Doug glanced down the alleyway, wondering why he'd put himself in this situation, with a man he disliked so much, and feared so greatly.

"He was all I had..." Walker said so quietly, Doug wasn't sure he heard him.

Walker snapped out of it and cleared his throat, straightening up, "Anyway. Why exactly are you sitting here?"

Doug hesitated, seeming to have an internal debate with himself, before he finally spoke, "I still don't like you. At all. Quite the opposite."

Walker kept watching him, "I know." He said again.

"And I won't forgive you for the things you did, the people you hurt..."

Walker sighed, "I get it. Is this going anywhere?"

Doug paused again, struggling to get the words out, "...You can stay... Just until you get a job or... Something. Not for long."

Walker smirked, "That's awfully kind of you, Dougie."

Doug groaned, regretting his decision already.

XXX

The first thing Doug learned about Walker when he took him back to his flat that evening, was that Walker infuriated him. The second thing he learned about him, was that Walker loved it.

"You've been here an hour and you've ate half my food!" Doug complained, peering into the fridge.

"No darling, I think that was you." Walker said dryly, picking up the wrapper for a family sized bag of crisps.

Doug snatched it from him, "I had a night in." He said defensively.

Walker laughed, sitting down at the breakfast bar, "Sure."

Doug scowled at him, "You're so annoying."

For a brief moment, Walker's face went serious, and Doug felt the fear building up in his belly. Shit, what if he'd angered him?

Walker's mouth slowly turned up in a smirk though. He was messing with him.

Doug exhaled shakily and turned back to look in the fridge. What was he _doing_? He was _scared_ of this man, he had no idea what he was truly capable of, and he'd just invited him into his home, where he slept. Was he safe? He wasn't even sure why he'd let Walker stay. He told himself it was to keep an eye on him.

"Oi, Doug," Walker said, making Doug jump slightly, "You gonna pick something or stand in the fridge all day?"

Doug cleared his throat, hastily closing the fridge, "Right. Sorry."

Walker studied him closely, "You don't have to be scared of me, Doug."

Doug scoffed, "Because you've been in Disney World for the past three years."

Walker smiled, amused, "You're funny."

"That means so much to me." Doug sighed.

"Are you regretting letting me stay already?" Walker asked after a pause.

Doug shrugged, "Maybe. Do you care?"

Walker didn't answer, he just watched him in that unnerving way.

Doug busied himself making some food, avoiding Walker's gaze.

"So. Where shall I sleep?" Walker stretched, picking up his bag.

"Take Will's old room," Doug pointed him in the right direction.

Walker nodded, "Well. Have a good sleep, etcetera. Try not to get too scared in the night." He flashed him a grin and went to his room.

Doug sighed heavily and took his usual place on the sofa, glancing behind him every so often.

He didn't sleep well that night.

**Just an FYI, I'm really not happy with this chapter. It's so short and rushed, but I can't seem to improve it.**


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